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How Can I Get Help with My Marriage?

How Can I Get Help with My Marriage?

Many individuals and couples are interested in learning how to have a healthy marriage before they “tie the knot” or, once married, before they run into trouble. Others realize they need assistance when they hit the first major bump in the road, for example, dealing with the stress many couples go through after the birth of their first child, or after living with a long period of financial stress, or a serious illness.

There may be a MRE program near you. You can do an initial search for programs on the NHMRC’s Programs and Initiatives page. But, there may also be a program sponsored by a local church or community center in your area that is not listed. For further information, see also: the NHMRC tip sheet: How to Know if You Have a Healthy Marriage. And, the NHMRC’s sister website, Two of Us, an interactive website with MRE information for individuals and couples that you may find helpful.

Other couples need help when they run into serious trouble with their relationship, such as discovering their partner has been unfaithful, or seems unable to give up their alcohol addiction. In these situations marriage and relationship education programs can be a useful first step to turning things around with your partner, but you will probably need specialized counseling to adequately deal with these issues. Men, in particular, are typically more comfortable learning about these issues in group workshops or classes first — rather than in individual counseling sessions — where they can hear other men and women talk about the similar challenges they face in their relationships, and learn new skills that can help them get along better. Some marriage education classes, such as Retrouvaille are tailored specifically to helping marriages in serious crisis.

If you are, or think you may be in an abusive or violent relationship, where you are fearful of your partner, who may be trying to control you, you should contact your local domestic violence program listed in the yellow pages, or the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 1-800-799-SAFE.

If you believe that more individualized, one-on-one marriage or relationship counseling is what you need, look for a qualified marriage or family therapist, psychologist or licensed professional counselor in your community. These have professional masters or doctoral degrees and are licensed by the state. However you should ask whether they have specific training in couple’s therapy/counseling, since many do not. The following resources may help you find a local therapist/counselor:

The National Registry of Marriage Friendly Therapists

American Association of Marriage and Family Therapy

American Association of Professional Counselors

American Psychologists Association


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